Innocence lost

My Facebook statuses have been full of words on kids these past months. Unfortunately, I’ve been referring to close family members, kids I’ve seen grow up and all of whom I love dearly. But now I really don’t know where life is taking them.

Case 1: “T” is a quiet and a fragile nurse-to-be. She’s supposed to be in her last year of nursing school this school year. But last April, my cousin found out she’s 1 month pregnant with her first boyfriend, a guy she’s been seeing for only a year. All dreams shattered, just like that. All of us were actually clueless on why these two people would be so stupid not to use protection, the soon-to-be health professionals that they are. Ok, I get it, kids nowadays are most often into premarital sex. I don’t condemn them, though in my mind I’d rather see them wait until their wedding night. But things are different than before. And we never can tell what happens when you’re in that moment, right? “T” was supposed to help her family out. Her Dad had a mild stroke a few weeks before her revelation and her Mom was working tirelessly as a laundry lady for foreign students just to help send them to college. I hate “T” really, for being so careless and not thinking of the consequences of her actions. But then again maybe she planned it all along. She wanted to escape responsibility. She would have been a good nurse. Such a pity!

Case 2: “L” just turned 15 last May. She’s the third in a brood of five, all sent to school by my loving aunt. Their parents, both unemployed ever since, have been depending on my aunt in New York. She does odd jobs here and there. Now more than 60, my only wish is that she returns home and just enjoy the remaining years of her life in her home country. But you see, she wouldn’t, even if she can. She wanted to have at least one “apo” finish college, so she could at least have some help. But I doubt that. The eldest didn’t even finish his 2-year course. At 24, he’s now a father to two kids, unemployed, and relies on his wife and my aunt for support. The second one, now a fourth year irregular nursing student, has incomplete grades, no PE classes, dropped no less than three subjects, and failed some, too. I think she just wants the allowance, and if she does finish school, it would take another 2 years from now. That’s 7 years in college, mind you. And then there’s “L”. I actually tried to send her to school last year, and even make her live in my house. But she was such a brat that she ended up returning to her family at the end of the first semester, claiming I didn’t give her enough money to school. The bitch! I even hired a school service for her! And now I heard she’s dating a second cousin, of all people! And her parents can’t do anything about it. Next thing I know this girl is ending up with a stork, too.

Case 3: The handsome “A” is a part-time fashion model and a second year HRM student. He’s probably the most “malambing” among my nephews and nieces. A “chickboy” wherever he went, I found out just last Saturday that he got his ex-girlfriend pregnant, but the girl’s parents aren’t forcing them into marriage. The girl’s got a new love, so is “A”. This is so 21st century! But I honestly admire the girl’s parents; I think that’s the best decision for the both of them. My nephew isn’t the type to deal with responsibility this early, but I know he’ll give the child a name, and that someday he’ll make a good father. And oh, “A” is “T’s” younger brother (just 11 months her junior), so that makes two instant grandchildren for my cousin this year. What a headache!

Case 4: “R” is 21 years old, a college dropout, and works odd jobs. He recently changed his Facebook status to “engaged”. He’s apparently going steady with someone for a few months now, a girl he met when he worked at a big grocery chain late last year. I just think 21 is still too early. He doesn’t even have a stable job and he should have been helping me out with his sister’s school needs. There you go, another one escaping responsibility. He doesn’t realize how big a responsibility is of starting a family.

I’m at a loss now. I’m hurting just as much as the other members of my family. We’ve had big dreams for these kids. But now I don’t know where they are headed. Yes, babies are blessings. But they should have waited for the right time; when they’ve established a career for themselves and they’ve already helped their parents even for a few years. I just pray that they’d be responsible parents. And that someday, they wouldn’t suffer the same fate their parents suffered because of them.